Messages with Meaning


Sermons delivered at Sanlando Springs by Pastor Jack Parrott

What's the Idea (of Marriage)?

Colossians 3:18-21
Presented on Mother's Day, May 11, 2008, © Dr. Jack Parrott
I. Introduction

  1. The Bible opens and concludes with a wedding (Genesis 2:23-24 and Rev 17.7-9).
      Family or families appears over 239 times in the Bible; and 'family of God' is one of the titles given to God's people.
  2. Marriages have a way of changing as time passes. Has your view of marriage changed over the years? What's your idea of marriage today?
      Let's look at God's idea of marriage as shown in Scripture.
II. What was God thinking when He created marriage?
  1. Marriage is to be a place of companionship.
    1. Genesis 2. 18--it is not good for Adam to be alone. What did God mean? Two thing: Humans are social beings; we live in relationships. Everything else in creation had someone to share life with, but Adam. God gave him an equal. Secondly, Adam wanted a family. God gave him a wife.
      1. One thing God didn't mean is 'get married because you're lonely.' No, go find a friend.
      2. The NT clearly shows that God doesn't intend for everyone to be married. Being single is not second-rate.
      3. A spouse is someone helps bring fulfillment to your life. They become what Scripture calls "one flesh".
    2. We need relationships even if we are not married. In the early church we see the missionaries traveling in pairs. Why did they do that? To give companionship and mutual support.
  2. Marriage is to be the place for having children.
    1. The natural order among humans is for a male and a female to have children.
    2. The correct pattern for giving birth is marriage and then children. Commitment comes before conception.
    3. Once a child is born it is the responsibility of both parents to provide for and nurture the child.
  3. Marriage is to be a place of communion with God
       Marriage begins at an altar where a man and a woman pledge themselves to God and to one another.
       Mary, the mother of Jesus, was called "blessed" and her husband Joseph was called "righteous". They were a God-honoring couple, and God used them to bring His Son into the world. Have the kind of marriage God can bless.
III. What has happened to God's plan for marriage?
  1. Marriage has become for some a relationship of convenience.

    1. In past times large families meant free labor on the farm or family business.
    2. In modern times, marriage is often for a cook, companionship, and another check to help play the bills... or as the kids say it, 'meals, thrills, and bills!'
  2. Marriage has become for some a relationship of control.
    The wives of verse 18 has become the "slaves" of verse 22, and the husband of verse 19 has become the 'master' in some households. I don't think that's what God had in mind. Biblical submission is more the recognition of roles than rights.
  3. Marriage has become for some a relationship which has been converted by culture. We have made marriage and family into something besides what God intended.
    1. Cohabitation—USA Today reports, "The number of unmarried couples living together increased tenfold from 1960 to 2000, the U.S. Census says; about 10 million people are living with a partner of the opposite sex."
    2. Abandoned children -- Based on current estimates, there are more than one and a half million children, teenagers and young adults trying to survive on U.S. streets today. More than 7,000 American children are abandoned each year. If all of the homeless youth were in one city, it would be the seventh largest city in the US.
    3. Media morality—portrays a lifestyle of pornography, playboys, and party girls.
IV. What does God want for marriage today?
  1. God wants marriage to be a stable place.
    1. God views marriage as a relationship based on a sacred commitment between adults and God.
    2. He tells us marriage will have its rough waters (1 Corinthians 7.28), but that doesn't mean abandon ship.
  2. God wants marriage to be a safe place.
    Each year in the US 2 million women are beaten by their partners, and more than half a million report being sexually assaulted. Domestic violence is the most common cause of injury to females between 15 and 44; and more than one million children are the victims of abuse every year. The home is not a safe place for many, many people.
  3. God wants marriage to be a spiritual place.
    1. If you're attempting to share your life with someone I can assure you there will come a time when you need God!
    2. There are repeated studies which demonstrate that a quality spiritual life improves your physical and mental health.
    3. Church benefits kids (you may think you don't need church, but your kids do!)
      A study of more than 18,000 parents and teachers by a team of researchers from Mississippi State University shows that participation in church attendance by parents and a solid spiritual environment at home positively affects a child's mental and emotional development as well as their behavior.
IV. Conclusion
  1. God has set forth a pattern for marriage in His Word.
  2. What if that's not the pattern of your marriage?
    1. If you seek forgiveness, God will give it.
    2. If you want to build according to God's plan, He'll help.

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